A Great Puzzling Expectation

Many moons ago a relative brought me a box set of puzzles at the beginning of the year-it had a dozen of the worlds most famous monuments. I decided then that I would complete all of the 12 of puzzles by the end of that year, I was about 9/10 at the time so it was slow pickings trying to make the puzzle, each puzzle had 500 pieces and it was quite a tough challenge for mini me.

I remember trying to complete the famous Giza pyramids puzzle, I did the border and then I became frustrated because all the pieces were a similar shade of yellow/blue. I promptly left that puzzle and moved onto a puzzle far close to home and which was more familiar-London’s Tower Bridge. Once again I completed the border and then became lost in the midst of the puzzles pieces of bricks and water.

I became fed up with the puzzles and my young mind became preoccupied by other wonders of the pre teen world-High School Musical. I fell in the trap of pre teen TV heaven that was Disney Channel (ahh Zac Efron my first crush!) Fast forward almost a decade, the puzzles were left uncompleted and ended up being thrown away since my mum doesn’t like ‘riff-raff’ in the house.

I have an odd feeling of trying to complete a puzzle again. At least my 18 year old mind won’t become easily distrac-oh look a butterfly!!!



After a long hard day of doing nothing but ‘window shopping’ I decided to embark on my long journey back home. Whilst being uncomfortably pressed against the train carriage I remembered that there was a slice of fresh cream cake in the fridge waiting for me. I licked my lips in anticipation and a few ‘mmhs’ and ‘ahhs’ slipped from my lips. Naturally I received a bunch of odd looks and a few glares from the other passengers because on the Tube in London one must not act odd and/or feral. Unfortunately I’m a bit of both you see…

Anyway, once I reached my destination I hopped off the Tube and I skipped back to my home eagerly. I unlocked the door hastily and I ran to my fridge (if only the cameras were recording me then- I broke the 100m record set by Usain Bolt). I yanked open the fridge and I scoured the shelves for my slice of cake- it was gone!

Naturally by being English I called 999-my old chum Sherlock will save me! However, a lady picked up and asked me what the emergency was-how peculiar, I didn’t know Sherlock had a receptionist. Anyhow I told her about my emergency, but she yelled at me telling me “pranks” aren’t funny and hanged up on me. How will I solve the mystery now? I then decided I should watch a bit of telly whilst I think things over.

As I walked into my living room, I saw two fat things sitting upon my cat (my poor cat was blue in the face) and eating my last slice of cake. I don’t know what they were as my vision was a bit hazy but they seemed like people but at the same time they seemed awfully odd. I decided they must have been Americans!

Just as I was about to snatch my cake away from their greedy mouths the door bell rang. I ran to the door and lo and behold the police had arrived! I thanked them for their prompt arrival in my hour of need, I took them to the living room and told them to send the Americans back to where they belonged-fat camp.

Next thing you know the police had arrested me.

Currently I am sitting in a small cell in prison, fortunately they have given me this piece of paper and a pen to occupy myself whilst the courts decide what the verdict is.

I guess you are wondering how on Earth did I get arrested and whether or not the Americans got sent to fat camp. Well, according to the police officers it is illegal to walk around the streets of London stark naked-I think the words they used was something along the lines of ‘indecent exposure’. They also told me pranking the police is illegal.

Now about those pesky cake stealing Americans-they didn’t exist, or so I was told. According to my lawyer it was not a bright idea taking magic mushrooms in the morning.

Hmmm, I thought these mushrooms I plucked from my back garden were supposedly healthy since they are what I called ‘organic’ as they were home grown after all…


WordPress App

Oooohh I just downloaded the WordPress app and it’s pretty cute (am I allowed to call an app cute?!)

I followed a bunch of blogs today and they are hilarious! Their humour was right up my street-well techinally right up my nerves haha. Since the brain converts the nerve impulses and… No-not funny? Sorry. 😦

Dreams? Phoenix? What?

I’m terribly uncreative so it was a painful process coming up with a name for my blog.

I wanted something that’s ‘cool’ and isn’t cliched or embarrassing, unfortunately my blog comes in the latter categories.

A phoenix is a mythical creature which (thanks for the definition wiki);

In Greek mythology, a phoenix or phenix (Ancient Greek φοίνιξ phóinīx) is a long-lived bird that is cyclically regenerated or reborn. Associated with the sun, a phoenix obtains new life by arising from the ashes of its predecessor.

And dreams are well you know dreams, a person’s hopes and aspirations or their most crazy fantasies. Sometimes it’s something that is outlandish and not particularly realistic. But most of the time it’s something which people strive to make a reality as it is something they believe will lead them to happiness.

By smashing the words dreams and phoenix together what I was trying to indicate was this blog is here to be eternal whereby my thoughts, dreams and opinions live on long after I leave the world behind. (Providing there’s an internet connection and any humans left using WordPress that is).

Also, I’m a big supporter of Liverpool FC and a phoenix is a part of the club’s crest, so for me the blog name ties in nicely with one of my interests.

Hello! Namaste! Guten Tag! Hola! Bonjour!

To those who are from the far corners of the world it’s nice to meet you *pretends to shake hands* and to those who I know that are stalking me-don’t worry, chances are I’ve stalked you too…

Welcome! Please have a seat and perhaps a cup of tea and make yourself feel at home. This is just my own little space in the big bad world (wide web), chances are I’ll be talking about something insignificant and nothing of interest to the majority of the several billion people in this world.